So my last post to this blog came almost two months ago, and it was about letting go. Much has happened since then. I lost an extended member of my family to a sudden and unexpected illness, Acute Respiratory Distress Syndrome, brought on by a seemingly innocuous cold/sinus infection that turned into a fatal case of pneumonia. I said goodbye to my faithful furry friend of many years, and the house is not quite the same without him.

Humans are creatures of habit. Routines and rituals give us comfort and lessen the stress of these uncertain times. We can become too comfortable in these familiar patterns—complacent, even bored. Then the loss of these things we have come to recognize as essential parts of our lives throws us into a time of questioning, or perhaps more appropriately, re-evaluation.

We review our past, the things we said or didn’t say, the things we did or didn’t do, and the things we meant to do but never got around to doing. We question the timing of tragic events, wonder about the sovereignty and character of a loving God who allows pain, suffering, and loss as part of His unfathomable plan. We take heart in the blessings we still have, and resolve to enjoy them for as long as possible.

But even in the face of deep personal loss, sudden or a long time coming, survival requires us to change our routines, to re-invent ourselves through the forging of new rituals that embrace the present and the future, while always remembering and acknowledging the past.

It always feels as if we will never recover. That the scar will remain, unhealed, forever. But God in His infinite wisdom gave human beings a remarkable ability to forget pain and to remember happiness. And it seems the only way to truly recover from loss is to forget the pain and embrace the happiness.

We say we will never forget, but what we really mean is that we will always remember the good times. That is what love does. In life and in death.